Suddenly, a
fierce storm struck the lake,
with waves
breaking into the boat.
But Jesus was sleeping.
Matthew
8:24
When the
disciples set out on the lake,
I am
guessing the water was calm.
Maybe the
sun was shining and all was well.
It says
that “suddenly” a storm struck.
I just had
a day like that.
I “got in
the boat” in the morning and all was well.
“Suddenly”
a storm struck.
You know
those storms that come out of nowhere.
The ones
that weren’t in the forecast,
and then,
bam, roaring tides and rushing wind.
Over the past months, I have been
pondering
the words broken, letting go,
imperfect, forward.
I have been
allowing Jesus to show me
how to be
at peace with brokenness,
how to let
go of things I cannot change,
and how to
find beauty in flawed things.
In the
middle of a day when I was thinking
that maybe I
was ok with broken,
a storm
suddenly comes up.
I am
confronted with a brokenness in another
that I was part of unknowingly causing.
The boat is
thrashing around and
I am not ok.
As I try to
figure out how what to do,
I come to two conclusions.
I know how
to say I was wrong.
I don’t
know how to control their response.
Because I can’t.
I ask Jesus for a large
dose of mercy.
He tells me
I have to be at peace.
No matter
what they do.
He tells me
to lie down and take a nap.
It seems
the craziest thing to do.
"You stress out because you're not in control.
There is not only peace for being wronged;
There is not only peace for being wronged;
My peace is also there when you are wrong.
You just have
to be willing to wait in the pain."
Taking a
nap in the midst of the storm
might just
be where the strength comes
to live in
brokenness and wait in the pain.
He still controls the wind and the waves,
and we can trust He is in the storm with us.
Trust gives me the courage I need
to be at peace in the storm.
I never realized how much courage
it would take to be at peace
with brokenness.
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